I was just thinking a couple of days ago how my kids are growing, how everyday I can see a sign of something new coming up, and how they are doing the next step by loving, trusting and supporting them.
One great example of the trusting part is the potty training, we tried to potty train my daughter about 8 months ago, and what we achieve was to put her off since she was not ready and the nursery was using a technique that was putting too much pressure on her, they sat her on the toilet every 20min, not very friendly approach I would say, but I did not realise this until now. About 2 months ago, my husband and I started talking to her about going to the potty or the toilet when she feels it is needed, so all the time we changed her nappy we reminded her.
Also when we went out with friends with kids and I pointed out for her how the kids were going to the toilet and not wearing nappies, so little by little she was getting more interested in knowing what was happening until a week ago she took the nappy off by herself and used the potty, and she actually did both things that night and then went to bed with a knicker on without wetting herself through the whole night, amazing!!!
I keep on with the training because she is more aware when she is at home but outside she does not understand yet where she is going to do it as well as she gets more distracted, however I am not pushing her or going crazy about it, I remind her sometimes if she wants to go to the toilet but I do not get frustrated if she has a little accident.
Related more to the love part, I have been reading a book called the secret of happy children, it talks about the two type of love we have to give to children, these two loves are named soft and firm by the writer, a wonderful way to describe how we should raise our children.
Children need our unconditional love to grow healthy, happy, confident and make a good contribution to the earth, this is were firm love takes part, we have to set clear rules for them and be consistent otherwise they will feel they can play around. This book also gives some great advises on how to handle the discipline by using a dealing technique, explain to children why something is wrong and let them think about it. It is a worth reading piece for all of those parents and carers around.
Last one but not least, support, only by being with them, they feel more confident to try and do new things, they take the risk. I could give many examples of this, but one good one is that my little boy once I sit down with him, he starts moving more about and explore more the things that surround him.
In addition to all I mentioned above, there is something very important, trusting yourself and the way you believe you should raise your children, always remembering that they need tones of those two types of love.
Thank you and love